A chat log

The name and place in this chat has been changed – any similarities… sorry, it was an honest mistake!

This chat happened in real life sometimes ago… a bit long… but quite funny… and sad

11:04:41: cheekygurl:  at least he’s a blonde
11:06:44: hotheaded bitch:  =))
11:06:49: hotheaded bitch:  he’s burnet
11:10:25: cheekygurl:  oh
11:10:30: cheekygurl:  i didnt remember
11:10:31: cheekygurl:  
11:10:42: cheekygurl:  they all look the same to me
11:10:43: hotheaded bitch:  hahahaha
11:10:52: hotheaded bitch:  yeah yeah
11:11:05: cheekygurl:  i miss him too
11:11:09: cheekygurl:  i hate this
11:11:15: cheekygurl:  not david, fyi
11:11:41: hotheaded bitch:  =))
11:11:50: hotheaded bitch:  i thought we’re talking about david
11:12:27: cheekygurl:  no…men in general
11:12:38: cheekygurl:  i miss him like crazy
11:12:42: hotheaded bitch:  =))
11:12:44: hotheaded bitch:  men?
11:12:46: hotheaded bitch:  =))
11:12:50: cheekygurl:  i feel like jumping on the next flight
11:13:00: hotheaded bitch:  what do u mean?
11:13:01: cheekygurl:  that lizard wont let me
11:13:07: hotheaded bitch:  i c
11:13:12: hotheaded bitch:  you want to move on
11:13:16: hotheaded bitch:  but cant
11:13:18: cheekygurl:  i just want to jump the next flight to smarang
11:13:24: hotheaded bitch:  =))
11:13:25: cheekygurl:  cant
11:13:34: hotheaded bitch:  he’s in semarang?
11:13:39: cheekygurl:  he said it’s inappropriate for a ‘lady’
11:13:49: cheekygurl:  he’s married
11:13:56: hotheaded bitch:  WHO????????????
11:13:59: cheekygurl:  he’s married to a local. i know it
11:14:04: hotheaded bitch:  WHAT THE FUCK??
11:14:11: cheekygurl:  lol
11:14:31: hotheaded bitch:  STOP BEING PARANOID GIRL!!!
11:14:37: cheekygurl:  i think he’s married to a local, that’s why he wont let me come to smarang
11:14:48: cheekygurl:  they have 2 kids now
11:14:53: hotheaded bitch:  because u r such a troublesome girl
11:15:09: hotheaded bitch:  if only you’re not this needy
11:15:14: hotheaded bitch:  he might ask u to
11:15:15: cheekygurl:  that’s the price of being with me yaaaa
11:15:30: hotheaded bitch:  that’s why he cant stand to be near u
11:15:40: cheekygurl:  can i use your name
11:15:43: cheekygurl:  ?
11:15:52: hotheaded bitch:  for what?
11:15:57: cheekygurl:  say that i’m with you, but i’m with him instead
11:15:58: cheekygurl:  ?
11:16:09: cheekygurl:  dini says no…some friend
11:16:10: hotheaded bitch:  =))
11:16:28: hotheaded bitch:  never come to them unless they ask you to
11:16:34: hotheaded bitch:  it’s annoying
11:16:59: cheekygurl:  yeah
11:17:08: cheekygurl:  i cant stand this!!!
11:17:17: hotheaded bitch:  dont be such a hag
11:17:24: cheekygurl:  he’ll never ask me
11:17:27: hotheaded bitch:  nagging like baby
11:17:32: cheekygurl:  he’s too old school
11:17:38: hotheaded bitch:  then stop paying attention to him
11:17:45: hotheaded bitch:  he will beg for it later
11:17:46: cheekygurl:  im not
11:17:55: hotheaded bitch:  YES U DO
11:17:58: cheekygurl:  i havent call him in 2 days
11:19:52: hotheaded bitch:  SOOOOOOOOOOOO?????????
11:20:03: hotheaded bitch:  i havent buzz david for 2 weeks
11:20:07: hotheaded bitch:  or 3
11:20:15: hotheaded bitch:  oh who’s counting
11:20:47: cheekygurl:  yeah
11:20:53: hotheaded bitch:  i’m waiting and hoping that my feeling will soon fade away
11:21:18: cheekygurl:  it will, if you stop any kind of communication with him
11:21:24: cheekygurl:  be nice to yourself
11:21:47: cheekygurl:  but you dont want to loose contact with him….so…. it’s an oxymoron
11:22:09: hotheaded bitch:  nope
11:22:16: hotheaded bitch:  a total moron to be exact
11:22:45: hotheaded bitch:  he’s in tokyo now
11:23:15: hotheaded bitch:  i dont know why I cant let go
11:23:23: hotheaded bitch:  i want it so much
11:23:50: hotheaded bitch:  but it seems that whenever he needs me, i hv got this feelings
11:23:56: cheekygurl:  coz, you feel like it is impossible for you to feel this kind of feeling with another guy
11:24:08: cheekygurl:  or small chance
11:24:37: cheekygurl:  so, you keep holding on to whatever you have right now
11:25:08: hotheaded bitch:  i know
11:25:10: cheekygurl:  the truth is…it is veerryyy possible for both of us to feel this way again with some other guys
11:25:29: cheekygurl:   ?
11:25:34: hotheaded bitch:  i dont think we will
11:25:41: cheekygurl:  nah
11:25:55: hotheaded bitch:  this is what i call mature love
11:26:01: cheekygurl:  as a freethinker…. i must not close that door of possibility
11:26:19: cheekygurl:  the possibility is there….but less likely to happen again
11:26:32: hotheaded bitch:  when you have feel many kinds of love
11:26:43: hotheaded bitch:  you know which is for real
11:26:52: hotheaded bitch:  and which is not
11:27:12: hotheaded bitch:  and i know that mature love, is not something that’s easy to get over
11:28:00: cheekygurl:  that’s not mature love
11:28:31: cheekygurl:  you found the kind of person you’re looking for
11:28:45: cheekygurl:  and you know, there arent many of them out there
11:29:31: cheekygurl:  there’s just gotta be more to life than this
11:30:04: hotheaded bitch:  mature love is when you dont have that annoying running through your head all day
11:31:21: hotheaded bitch:  it’s just love
11:31:38: hotheaded bitch:  without any terms and condition
11:31:40: cheekygurl:  nooo
11:31:53: cheekygurl:  that running thing is just my libido
11:31:58: cheekygurl:  you told me so
11:32:05: hotheaded bitch:  I didnt talk about u
11:32:19: hotheaded bitch:  i was talking about love
11:32:20: cheekygurl:  yeah…
11:32:27: cheekygurl:  you have your libido under control
11:32:44: cheekygurl:  but the rest of it… i dont think it’s love
11:32:53: cheekygurl:  i think it’s your own fear
11:33:01: hotheaded bitch:  to be honest, I dont have that strong urge to jump him
11:33:08: cheekygurl:  see?
11:33:16: hotheaded bitch:  i just want to see the smile on his face
11:33:26: hotheaded bitch:  to see that he is well taken care of
11:33:30: cheekygurl:  it’s your fear of never finding any guy like david anymore
11:33:52: hotheaded bitch:  there will be no one like him
11:34:10: cheekygurl:  mine is still circling around my libido and my urge to have a baby
11:34:12: hotheaded bitch:  but i might found someone else that i grew fond of later
11:34:25: hotheaded bitch:  you dont want babies
11:34:30: cheekygurl:  of course no one is like david
11:34:34: hotheaded bitch:  you just need a reason to live
11:34:49: cheekygurl:  i just want to experience motherhood
11:34:58: cheekygurl:  i feel like i’ve done everything
11:35:04: hotheaded bitch:  yes, you need a reason to be here on earth
11:35:08: cheekygurl:  except going to europe
11:35:12: hotheaded bitch:  lol
11:35:13: cheekygurl:  i dont need
11:35:23: cheekygurl:  i’m already here
11:35:24: hotheaded bitch:  then why dont u just die
11:35:35: cheekygurl:  coz im still breathing
11:35:41: hotheaded bitch:  u need to experience death also
11:35:48: cheekygurl:  and i’ve never tried motherhood
11:35:49: hotheaded bitch:  it might be fun
11:35:54: hotheaded bitch:  naahh
11:36:01: cheekygurl:  i’ve never tried being a wife
11:36:03: hotheaded bitch:  motherhood is not that good
11:36:12: cheekygurl:  like you know
11:36:18: cheekygurl:  you hate children
11:36:26: hotheaded bitch:  being a spouse is not something you r good at
11:36:37: cheekygurl:  being pregnant, i want to feel what it’s like
11:36:47: hotheaded bitch:  buy a pregnancy kit
11:36:50: hotheaded bitch:  and buy a kid
11:37:04: cheekygurl:  maybe i will
11:37:09: hotheaded bitch:  if u want to feel giving birth like
11:37:11: cheekygurl:  buy a kid
11:37:20: hotheaded bitch:  just plant a cist
11:37:27: cheekygurl:  i’m thinking about buying a kid
11:37:32: hotheaded bitch:  yeah yeah
11:37:34: hotheaded bitch:  buy one
11:37:41: cheekygurl:  it’s just soooo expensive
11:37:45: hotheaded bitch:  but remember to find back up parents
11:37:50: hotheaded bitch:  no it’s not
11:38:10: cheekygurl:  yes, it cost my friend almost 20 millions
11:38:11: hotheaded bitch:  go to some village with 5 mills
11:38:18: hotheaded bitch:  and buy someone’s kid
11:38:25: cheekygurl:  i want to do it legally
11:38:27: cheekygurl:  come on
11:38:31: hotheaded bitch:  hey
11:38:44: hotheaded bitch:  you want it just for the kick of it
11:38:51: cheekygurl:  there are rules in this world
11:39:07: hotheaded bitch:  as an atheist, you pay attention to rules???
11:39:09: hotheaded bitch:  =))
11:39:15: cheekygurl:  hell yeah
11:39:22: hotheaded bitch:  now that’s what i called ironic
11:39:30: cheekygurl:  geez
11:39:41: cheekygurl:  you are more ignorant than i thought
11:39:45: cheekygurl:  i’m sorry
11:39:52: cheekygurl:  :-s
11:39:54: hotheaded bitch:  hey
11:40:07: hotheaded bitch:  i am pissed at your intention to buy a fucking kid
11:40:17: cheekygurl:  so??
11:40:25: hotheaded bitch:  you think like you’re planning to buy a goddam puppy
11:40:32: cheekygurl:  he’ll be well taken care of
11:40:38: cheekygurl:  he’ll be loved
11:40:38: hotheaded bitch:  says who?
11:40:48: hotheaded bitch:  you cant even take care of yourself
11:40:49: cheekygurl:  i just did
11:41:04: hotheaded bitch:  you need lots of people to hold your emotion
11:41:10: cheekygurl:  better than a lot of ppl i know
11:41:18: cheekygurl:  at least
11:41:24: hotheaded bitch:  and how can you hold this kid’s emotion?
11:41:58: cheekygurl:  this is only a kid
11:42:06: cheekygurl:  i can manage until his teens
11:42:24: cheekygurl:  a kid is happy with a bag of oreo
11:42:30: hotheaded bitch:  yeah of course, when he/she reaches teens, we can just easily discard IT
11:42:30: cheekygurl:  and a story before bed
11:42:46: cheekygurl:  that’s when i can see my result
11:42:52: hotheaded bitch:  you are ignorant
11:43:05: cheekygurl:  im being realistic
11:43:07: hotheaded bitch:  read all those parenting articles
11:43:14: hotheaded bitch:  read them
11:43:18: cheekygurl:  i’m never gonna be a perfect parent
11:43:20: hotheaded bitch:  I’m realistic
11:43:26: cheekygurl:  at least i will try
11:43:31: hotheaded bitch:  you are deluded
11:43:46: hotheaded bitch:  you need more than money and fucking oreo
11:43:52: cheekygurl:  and there will be 1 less hungry kid in this world
11:44:03: hotheaded bitch:  you need to be an adult first
11:44:14: hotheaded bitch:  feed those kids if u like
11:44:20: hotheaded bitch:  but dont take them as urs
11:44:27: cheekygurl:  we are all a kid inside
11:44:57: hotheaded bitch:  yes, the mature human will have good decision of when to be one
11:45:12: hotheaded bitch:  damn girl
11:45:26: cheekygurl:  sure
11:45:32: hotheaded bitch:  i am so angry at u rite now
11:45:40: cheekygurl:  im going through it at this moment
11:45:56: cheekygurl:  when im done
11:46:05: cheekygurl:  im gonna get that kid
11:46:15: hotheaded bitch:  you cant BUY A FUCKING KID JUST BECAUSE U WANT TO EXPERIENCE
11:46:28: cheekygurl:  so?
11:46:34: cheekygurl:  this is life
11:46:34: hotheaded bitch:  that kid is A FUCKING HUMAN BEING
11:46:41: cheekygurl:  might just get everything you can
11:46:54: cheekygurl:  it’s not like im gonna torture him
11:46:55: hotheaded bitch:  i thought you ppl are more humanistic
11:46:59: hotheaded bitch:  yes u will
11:47:00: cheekygurl:  im just gonna feed him
11:47:06: cheekygurl:  and bathe him
11:47:12: hotheaded bitch:  HE NEED MORE THAN THAT
11:47:20: hotheaded bitch:  he’s not a fucking PUPPY
11:47:27: cheekygurl:  take him to see the doctor when he get sick
11:47:38: cheekygurl:  read story before bed
11:47:44: cheekygurl:  make it feel safe
11:47:48: cheekygurl:  so??
11:47:53: hotheaded bitch:  you r describing a puppy do u know that?
11:47:56: cheekygurl:  dont worry, im not a paedophile
11:48:12: hotheaded bitch:  but you are a sick woman
11:48:23: cheekygurl:  hey, i love my puppies
11:48:36: hotheaded bitch:  then get urself a goddam puppy
11:48:37: cheekygurl:  what makes my puppy less lovable?
11:48:50: cheekygurl:  no lah
11:48:53: hotheaded bitch:  human are the weakest animal
11:49:03: cheekygurl:  so?
11:49:03: hotheaded bitch:  they cant live on their own
11:49:11: hotheaded bitch:  dogs can
11:49:17: cheekygurl:  that’s why im helping it to grow
11:49:34: hotheaded bitch:  i thought you hv got an excellent brain
11:49:41: hotheaded bitch:  read more
11:49:54: hotheaded bitch:  read human development psychology
11:50:01: cheekygurl:  sure
11:50:06: hotheaded bitch:  you will know that HUMAN ARE NOT PUPPIES
11:50:26: hotheaded bitch:  you disappointed me
11:50:45: cheekygurl:  hey
11:50:56: cheekygurl:  they are both living creatures
11:51:10: cheekygurl:  trying to survive
11:51:18: hotheaded bitch:  yes, but one can be eaten while others shouldnt
11:51:18: cheekygurl:  i want to help one to survive
11:51:37: cheekygurl:  i dont see the connection
11:51:52: hotheaded bitch:  …I miss talking to an adult
11:52:43: hotheaded bitch:  you need to see a shrink
11:52:50: hotheaded bitch:  just go pls
11:53:12: hotheaded bitch:  and get some idea of your life purpose
11:53:13: cheekygurl:  lol
11:53:33: cheekygurl:  my life purpose is to survive
11:53:45: cheekygurl:  and help other to survive as much as i can
11:53:56: hotheaded bitch:  and not to ruin others life, i presume?
11:54:07: cheekygurl:  sorry, i dont have any heaven to go to after this
11:54:17: hotheaded bitch:  read of how a fucked up parents can messed up a kid’s life
11:54:26: cheekygurl:  and i ruin others? thank you
11:54:34: hotheaded bitch:  i dont even want to talk about heaven
11:54:35: cheekygurl:  thank you for your trust
11:55:02: hotheaded bitch:  you need to evaluate yourself
11:55:09: cheekygurl:  nah
11:55:13: hotheaded bitch:  evaluate your capability
11:55:16: cheekygurl:  i know myself
11:55:30: hotheaded bitch:  and I am ignoring your sarcasm to be a good friend
11:55:31: cheekygurl:  at this moment, at least
11:55:49: cheekygurl:  remind me if i ruin yours, please
11:55:54: hotheaded bitch:  tell me then, why do you need batak’s love that much?
11:55:55: cheekygurl:  never my intention
11:56:07: cheekygurl:  it’s sex
11:56:17: cheekygurl:  you help me see that
11:56:19: cheekygurl:  come ooon
11:56:23: hotheaded bitch:  why do you need sex from batak that much?
11:56:40: hotheaded bitch:  (still ignoring your sarcasm)
11:56:47: cheekygurl:  because i just find out i like it
11:56:58: cheekygurl:  and i cant just do it with any guy
11:57:10: hotheaded bitch:  and you do realized that any guy can do it to?
11:57:11: cheekygurl:  it’s like sharing a spoon
11:57:19: hotheaded bitch:  so why you need only batak guy?
11:57:24: cheekygurl:  i cant just share a spoon with any guy
11:57:35: hotheaded bitch:  you can find any virgin guy
11:57:37: cheekygurl:  coz im comfortable with him
11:57:48: hotheaded bitch:  why do you feel comfortable with him?
11:58:00: cheekygurl:  /.
11:58:02: cheekygurl:  who knows
11:58:04: cheekygurl:  ?
11:58:13: hotheaded bitch:  you need to answer that
11:58:19: cheekygurl:  maybe cos we were friends b4
11:58:30: cheekygurl:  how many guy friend i have?
11:58:40: hotheaded bitch:  why do you think friends can make u comfortable?
11:58:41: cheekygurl:  no more than 4 if you count sonny
11:58:54: cheekygurl:  social creatures?
11:59:09: hotheaded bitch:  i’m asking your reason
11:59:17: hotheaded bitch:  not social theory
11:59:18: cheekygurl:  that’s a 5th grade question
11:59:29: cheekygurl:  you know what my answer would be
11:59:34: hotheaded bitch:  tell me
11:59:40: hotheaded bitch:  i dont assume or guess
11:59:47: cheekygurl:  we’ve been through this 1000 times
11:59:54: cheekygurl:  i dont need a reason to exist
11:59:54: hotheaded bitch:  nope
11:59:59: cheekygurl:  i just exist
12:00:09: cheekygurl:  daaang :-@
12:00:09: hotheaded bitch:  i dont ask for your reason to exist
12:00:24: hotheaded bitch:  i’m asking you why friends making u comfortable
12:00:55: cheekygurl:  you are doubting my capability to love another being
12:00:59: cheekygurl:  im not that selfish
12:01:14: cheekygurl:  you of all ppl, should know better
12:01:21: hotheaded bitch:  did I say that I doubt your capability?
12:01:29: cheekygurl:  yes
12:01:36: hotheaded bitch:  did I say anything about your capability?
12:01:41: cheekygurl:  that’s an insult in my dictionary
12:02:07: hotheaded bitch:  it wasnt me who say anything about capabilities
12:02:16: cheekygurl:  yes you just did
12:02:20: cheekygurl:  press f3
12:02:43: cheekygurl:  you think i can never love something more complicated than a puppy
12:02:44: hotheaded bitch:  I said :”capability to hold other’s emotion”
12:02:50: cheekygurl:  not batak guy
12:02:59: cheekygurl:  not a child
12:03:52: hotheaded bitch:  honey, you know I cant do this with you
12:04:18: hotheaded bitch:  you do know that it is perfectly okay to go to a psychologist?
12:04:29: cheekygurl:  no lah
12:04:40: cheekygurl:  it’s enough what you said
12:04:49: cheekygurl:  maybe it’s true
12:04:54: hotheaded bitch:  see… you’re angry to me now
12:05:10: hotheaded bitch:  this is why it is unethical
12:05:16: cheekygurl:  maybe i am not capable of loving something other than myself
12:05:22: cheekygurl:  no im not angry
12:05:33: cheekygurl:  it’s a criticism
12:05:38: hotheaded bitch:  it is not
12:05:49: hotheaded bitch:  I’m trying to shake u up
12:06:08: hotheaded bitch:  i’m trying to evoke your subconscious
12:06:12: cheekygurl:  someone with such high intellectual capability should be able to bear criticism
12:06:23: hotheaded bitch:  lol
12:06:33: hotheaded bitch:  if you say so
12:06:40: cheekygurl:  hey…it’s easier to see from a distance sometimes
12:07:14: hotheaded bitch:  but for me, a normal human being are allowed to be angry
12:07:20: cheekygurl:  you must have a strong reason to think that way
12:07:30: cheekygurl:  im not angry kok
12:07:39: hotheaded bitch:  i do have a reason
12:07:47: cheekygurl:  it’s not like you stab me in the back
12:07:47: hotheaded bitch:  but i cant say it
12:07:52: hotheaded bitch:  :)
12:08:18: hotheaded bitch:  like i said sometimes back
12:08:29: hotheaded bitch:  it is a reason that you need to find yourself
12:08:56: hotheaded bitch:  it might gives a huge disappointment to yourself
12:08:59: cheekygurl:  my self this moment is different than my self 2 second ago
12:09:13: hotheaded bitch:  or you might get angry
12:09:17: cheekygurl:  just make sure i have my feet on the ground
12:09:28: cheekygurl:  why should i?
12:09:30: hotheaded bitch:  you are the same person, with more knowledge
12:09:39: cheekygurl:  just a waste of energy
12:09:48: hotheaded bitch:  because you are an intellectual being
12:10:07: hotheaded bitch:  that need to find more inside before to find more outside
12:10:14: cheekygurl:  yeah…
12:10:23: cheekygurl:  i know i can love another being tho’
12:10:33: cheekygurl:  if i want it bad enough
12:10:38: hotheaded bitch:  an understanding of oneself will lead to wisdom
12:11:17: hotheaded bitch:  wisdom will open a path to vast knowledge
12:11:28: cheekygurl:  and i still want to adopt a kid :-p
12:12:05: hotheaded bitch:  I suggest, understand yourself and then buy a fucking kid if u want
12:12:25: cheekygurl:  i see my self
12:12:27: cheekygurl:  sure sure
12:12:49: hotheaded bitch:  seeing is not the same as understanding
12:13:18: cheekygurl:  i just never thought i’m a selfish biatch who doesnt have the capability of sacrifice
12:13:38: hotheaded bitch:  to love is to let go
12:13:47: cheekygurl:  i sacrifice a lot of things….
12:13:51: hotheaded bitch:  to let go is to sacrifice
12:13:52: cheekygurl:  i just never talk about it
12:14:00: cheekygurl:  well some…
12:14:06: cheekygurl:  some i like to hold on to
12:14:22: hotheaded bitch:  when you feel what you do as sacrifices, then I think it’s not love
12:14:31: cheekygurl:  sure
12:15:08: cheekygurl:  i put people before me, that kind of sacrifice
12:15:43: cheekygurl:  and try my best so noone will have to know about it
12:15:49: cheekygurl:  including the person
12:15:57: cheekygurl:  that kind of sacrifice
12:16:15: hotheaded bitch:  act of love is not sacrifices
12:16:54: hotheaded bitch:  when i went to mexico, i didnt see it as sacrifice
12:17:16: cheekygurl:  of course is not
12:17:17: hotheaded bitch:  i want to prove to myself whether my feelings are true or not
12:17:28: hotheaded bitch:  but if i think like u
12:17:37: hotheaded bitch:  i would say that david is being unfair
12:17:51: cheekygurl:  he’s just being him self
12:17:59: hotheaded bitch:  i put up with all the trouble to see him
12:18:07: hotheaded bitch:  but he didnt even pick me
12:18:15: cheekygurl:  did he know that?
12:18:26: hotheaded bitch:  that wasnt a sacrifice
12:18:30: cheekygurl:  all the trouble you went through?
12:18:39: hotheaded bitch:  i dont need him to know
12:18:53: hotheaded bitch:  it was for me and him to realize
12:18:59: cheekygurl:  to him, it was just a vacation with your girl friend
12:19:08: cheekygurl:  he happen to tag along
12:19:08: hotheaded bitch:  whether the feeling is true or not
12:19:15: hotheaded bitch:  nope
12:19:27: hotheaded bitch:  he know that i come to mexico to see him
12:19:43: cheekygurl:  im sorry
12:19:48: hotheaded bitch:  since it’s actually i dont need to go to mexico
12:19:52: cheekygurl:  if that’s true
12:19:58: hotheaded bitch:  no matter
12:20:07: hotheaded bitch:  it was necessary for me
12:20:10: cheekygurl:  i officially think he’s a dickhead
12:20:42: cheekygurl:  he should’ve consider how he would make you feel
12:20:51: hotheaded bitch:  he just realize that he dont feel the same way as i do
12:21:01: hotheaded bitch:  and its perfectly fine
12:21:04: cheekygurl:  all the consequences on him and on you
12:21:06: hotheaded bitch:  i want him to be happy
12:21:08: cheekygurl:  for you
12:21:11: cheekygurl:  not for me
12:21:15: hotheaded bitch:  ;))
12:21:25: cheekygurl:  i dont like him treating you that way
12:21:31: cheekygurl:  so not acceptable
12:21:32: hotheaded bitch:  as long as he’s happy…
12:21:42: hotheaded bitch:  this is what i called let go
12:21:55: hotheaded bitch:  i will still have that feelings
12:21:58: cheekygurl:  but you’re not letting go baby
12:22:04: cheekygurl:  it’s dragging you
12:22:07: hotheaded bitch:  but i wont chase him
12:22:10: hotheaded bitch:  yes
12:22:20: hotheaded bitch:  i didnt let go FOR ME
12:22:26: hotheaded bitch:  but i let him go
12:22:36: cheekygurl:  that’s what im talking about
12:22:43: hotheaded bitch:  ;))
12:22:49: hotheaded bitch:  i dont chase him
12:23:01: cheekygurl:  hey
12:23:09: cheekygurl:  i know one thing
12:23:12: hotheaded bitch:  i dont want to make him uncomfortable
12:23:21: cheekygurl:  everybody has the right to be happy
12:23:24: hotheaded bitch:  yes
12:23:35: hotheaded bitch:  and for me, mind u, for me
12:23:45: cheekygurl:  need to find your happiness
12:23:47: hotheaded bitch:  i’m happy if he found his reason to be happy
12:23:51: cheekygurl:  YOUR happiness
12:24:06: cheekygurl:  yeah, and you call his girlfriend DUMMY
12:24:21: hotheaded bitch:  my happiness should not give unhappiness to others
12:24:30: cheekygurl:  /:)
12:24:37: hotheaded bitch:  hey i was jealous
12:24:52: hotheaded bitch:  but i didnt lay my hand on her
12:24:59: hotheaded bitch:  i respect her
12:25:13: hotheaded bitch:  and i respect david’s choice
12:25:17: cheekygurl:  it doesnt have to be physical puhleeze
12:25:32: cheekygurl:  you just dont approve of it
12:33:11: hotheaded bitch:  like i said
12:33:22: hotheaded bitch:  for me that’s why i called love
12:33:36: hotheaded bitch:  for each person, it can be different
12:34:09: hotheaded bitch:  i just want to person i love to be happy even it means not with me
12:34:28: cheekygurl:  that’s self torture to me
12:34:40: hotheaded bitch:  that’s unconditional love
12:34:46: hotheaded bitch:  :D
12:34:53: hotheaded bitch:  cinta tak berujung
12:34:55: cheekygurl:  you can feel better with some other guy
12:35:01: hotheaded bitch:  yes i can
12:35:09: hotheaded bitch:  but can i love more?
12:35:10: cheekygurl:  but you choose feel pain of not having this one
12:35:15: hotheaded bitch:  maybe
12:35:27: cheekygurl:  life’s too short baby
12:35:34: hotheaded bitch:  maybe I’m just a fucked up masochist
12:35:36: hotheaded bitch:  :D
12:35:54: cheekygurl:  and you only got the good look for another 10 years
12:36:07: hotheaded bitch:  maybe
12:36:12: hotheaded bitch:  so what?
12:36:23: cheekygurl:  this ‘unconditional love’ thingy will take 5 years of that
12:36:31: cheekygurl:  
12:36:38: hotheaded bitch:  the person i love and who loves me back should not see me on skin layer
12:36:43: hotheaded bitch:  perhaps
12:36:54: cheekygurl:  im not talking about other
12:37:04: cheekygurl:  i thought you love your looks
12:38:01: cheekygurl:  dont you want to hold on to it as long as you can?
12:39:16: hotheaded bitch:  =))
12:39:21: hotheaded bitch:  yes i want
12:39:34: cheekygurl:  see?
12:39:44: hotheaded bitch:  not that i’m wasting it
12:39:55: cheekygurl:  that’s a good reason to let yourself go
12:40:02: hotheaded bitch:  i dont want him to see me by my face value
12:40:07: hotheaded bitch:  i’m letting go
12:40:13: hotheaded bitch:  i dont chase him
12:40:21: cheekygurl:  iiiih
12:40:24: cheekygurl:  not that
12:40:37: hotheaded bitch:  i’m not closing myself too
12:40:45: cheekygurl:  that emotional fence you build around yourself
12:40:54: hotheaded bitch:  no fence
12:41:04: hotheaded bitch:  just standards
12:41:07: hotheaded bitch:  :D
12:41:14: hotheaded bitch:  like any of us have
12:41:23: cheekygurl:  oooohh i willlll nevvvvvverrrrr findddddddd anyyyooneeee likeeee daaaavvvvviiiiddddd
12:41:29: cheekygurl:  *playing air violin*
12:41:37: hotheaded bitch:  i did fell for Harry, remember?
12:41:43: hotheaded bitch:  too bad that his married
12:41:48: cheekygurl:  it was not
12:41:52: hotheaded bitch:  yes it was
12:41:56: cheekygurl:  it was just a crush
12:41:59: hotheaded bitch:  lol
12:42:05: hotheaded bitch:  i fell for him
12:42:15: cheekygurl:  crush
12:42:21: cheekygurl:  an infatuation
12:42:22: hotheaded bitch:  he was even better than david
12:42:31: cheekygurl:  like i have for Fabio
12:42:42: hotheaded bitch:  yes infatuation that might lead to love if i let it
12:42:52: hotheaded bitch:  but the minute i know that he’s married
12:43:01: hotheaded bitch:  it’s gone into thin air
12:43:06: cheekygurl:  love needs something more than that
12:43:11: cheekygurl:  just emails…dunno
12:43:14: cheekygurl:  IMHO sih
12:43:18: hotheaded bitch:  ihihihi
12:43:26: cheekygurl:  you fell for his virtual image
12:43:32: hotheaded bitch:  i dont need physical for love eight?
12:43:35: hotheaded bitch:  maybe
12:43:40: hotheaded bitch:  virtual love
12:43:53: cheekygurl:  not physical either…i dunno
12:43:57: hotheaded bitch:  which many ppl these days happen to make it
12:44:06: hotheaded bitch:  and it’s okay
12:44:07: cheekygurl:  just that it’s soo easy to lie virtually
12:44:14: cheekygurl:  ya sih
12:44:18: cheekygurl:  is it?
12:44:18: hotheaded bitch:  i dont have that attachments to him just yet
12:44:29: hotheaded bitch:  that’s why it’s easier to let go
12:44:38: hotheaded bitch:  as for david
12:44:50: cheekygurl:  i think you just need to think that you could be happy again w someone else
12:44:55: hotheaded bitch:  i have a strange attachment
12:45:05: hotheaded bitch:  i will
12:45:13: hotheaded bitch:  i just need to find the guy first
12:45:18: cheekygurl:  so that you dont get all weepy and teary with just a single tweet from that guy
12:45:31: hotheaded bitch:  i’m not just hanging around waiting for david
12:45:46: cheekygurl:  no you’re not
12:45:50: hotheaded bitch:  :))
12:45:54: hotheaded bitch:  i’m not
12:46:02: cheekygurl:  but a tweet from him is enough to make you emotional
12:46:16: hotheaded bitch:  it’s just happen that i havent found other love
12:46:38: hotheaded bitch:  that tweet, as you say it, found a way to my heart
12:46:57: hotheaded bitch:  of course i got emotional
12:47:13: hotheaded bitch:  you cant choose the ppl you love
12:47:19: hotheaded bitch:  but you can choose your life
12:47:36: hotheaded bitch:  i choose to be an observer
12:47:52: hotheaded bitch:  who fell in love with her subject
12:48:14: cheekygurl:  lol
12:48:47: cheekygurl:  im gonna ask batak guy
12:48:53: hotheaded bitch:  what?
12:48:59: cheekygurl:  does he think like you do
12:49:04: hotheaded bitch:  sure
12:49:17: hotheaded bitch:  i’m sure he thinks differently
12:49:30: cheekygurl:  i know you’re right on one thing
12:49:34: hotheaded bitch:  he is after all a primitive being, man
12:49:37: hotheaded bitch:  what?
12:49:48: cheekygurl:  if i dont think about sex so much, i dont miss him that much
12:50:03: cheekygurl:  yeah, of course i want to see his face
12:50:22: cheekygurl:  but i dont feel like yapping and jumping on to the next flight to semarang
12:57:42: hotheaded bitch:  hm..
12:57:54: hotheaded bitch:  he’s only symbol for sex
12:58:12: cheekygurl:  probably
12:58:27: cheekygurl:  my sexual object
12:58:36: cheekygurl:  shesh im so shallow
12:59:15: hotheaded bitch:  ;))
12:59:17: cheekygurl:  hey, i pamper my man
12:59:25: hotheaded bitch:  you dont
12:59:29: hotheaded bitch:  u use him
12:59:33: cheekygurl:  i take care of him like he’s 5 sometimes
12:59:47: cheekygurl:  in exchange for sex
12:59:56: cheekygurl:  :p
13:00:03: cheekygurl:  ask him
13:00:23: cheekygurl:  i do kok
13:00:33: cheekygurl:  it’s just i want something in return
13:00:51: cheekygurl:  berujung
13:01:24: hotheaded bitch:  5 what?
13:01:48: cheekygurl:  like he’s 5 years old
13:01:55: hotheaded bitch:  =))
13:02:34: hotheaded bitch:  you need more to make him attached to u
13:04:50: hotheaded bitch:  you need adult treatment
13:05:11: hotheaded bitch:  you need to make him feel that he got u in every aspect of his life
13:06:02: cheekygurl:  of course
13:06:19: cheekygurl:  the only problem is that i dont believe in jesus
13:06:26: hotheaded bitch:  i c
13:06:33: cheekygurl:  like his family wants
13:06:35: hotheaded bitch:  that’s all
13:06:49: cheekygurl:  at least that what he said
13:06:54: hotheaded bitch:  do what others do
13:06:58: hotheaded bitch:  pretend
13:07:04: hotheaded bitch:  sacrifice
13:07:10: cheekygurl:  then he also promised me that he will fight for me
13:07:16: cheekygurl:  oh suree
13:07:22: cheekygurl:  i have no problem with that
13:07:34: hotheaded bitch:  so say that
13:07:41: cheekygurl:  splash me, i’ll recite the our fathers
13:08:00: hotheaded bitch:  tell him that you’re willing to put it in ur KTP
13:08:07: hotheaded bitch:  and even marry in a church
13:08:17: cheekygurl:  yeah… maybe
13:08:30: cheekygurl:  im a bit afraid he might chase me about it
13:08:49: hotheaded bitch:  so?
13:09:00: hotheaded bitch:  u chase him like crazy
13:09:06: hotheaded bitch:  you know
13:09:13: cheekygurl:  not to be married toooo
13:09:16: hotheaded bitch:  you will hate him if he chases u
13:09:36: cheekygurl:  how did i get so complicated?
13:10:11: cheekygurl:   ?
13:10:19: hotheaded bitch:  when u decide to be different
13:10:35: hotheaded bitch:  you will get complication
13:10:57: cheekygurl:  i dont think im ready for the commotion
13:10:59: cheekygurl:  i just want him near
13:11:17: hotheaded bitch:  to do whatever u want
13:11:22: hotheaded bitch:  u need a puppy
13:11:24: hotheaded bitch:  ;))
13:11:35: cheekygurl:  i cant fuck a puppy
13:11:38: cheekygurl:  yuck
13:11:55: cheekygurl:  i actually like taking care of batak
13:11:57: hotheaded bitch:  u & ur libido
13:12:06: hotheaded bitch:  this is what sonny talks about
13:12:07: hotheaded bitch:  :D
13:12:13: cheekygurl:  yeah
13:12:15: cheekygurl:  i know
13:12:22: cheekygurl:  it’s true
13:12:30: cheekygurl:  batak guyknows it too
13:12:51: hotheaded bitch:  i will tell batak guy to stop pleasing u
13:13:04: hotheaded bitch:  u will not like him anymore
13:13:10: hotheaded bitch:  =))
13:13:29: cheekygurl:  i’ll be gone in 5 min
13:13:41: cheekygurl:  dont give him any idea
13:13:47: hotheaded bitch:  ;))
13:14:00: hotheaded bitch:  i didnt promise u anything, do i?
13:14:07: cheekygurl:  i’m just so hooked
13:14:11: cheekygurl:  oh shit
13:14:15: cheekygurl:  i’m sick
13:14:24: hotheaded bitch:  =))
13:14:30: hotheaded bitch:  go see a shrink
13:14:31: cheekygurl:  there’s a reason why my libido is this high
13:14:49: cheekygurl:  nah, a psychologist is sufficient
13:14:54: hotheaded bitch:  reason….
13:15:00: cheekygurl:  i’m not hyper or anything like that
13:15:07: hotheaded bitch:  DONT USE ME DAMMIT
13:15:15: cheekygurl:  i’m not
13:15:19: hotheaded bitch:  okay
13:15:21: cheekygurl:  i still got fabio for that
13:15:25: cheekygurl:  
13:15:32: cheekygurl:  he’s a guy
13:15:39: cheekygurl:  he might know a thing or two
13:15:42: hotheaded bitch:  i mean dont use me as your psychologist
13:15:46: hotheaded bitch:  sick bastard
13:15:59: hotheaded bitch:  i can gives you names…
13:16:04: cheekygurl:  you always act like one!!
13:16:10: hotheaded bitch:  :((
13:16:13: hotheaded bitch:  cant help it
13:16:16: hotheaded bitch:  :((
13:16:18: cheekygurl:  you’re a researcher
13:16:21: cheekygurl:  goddamit
13:16:29: hotheaded bitch:  i am
13:16:46: hotheaded bitch:  that’s why i need answer for anything
13:16:50: hotheaded bitch:  :D
13:16:54: hotheaded bitch:  cant help it also
13:16:58: cheekygurl:  and i dont
13:17:05: hotheaded bitch:  you refuse
13:17:06: cheekygurl:  sometimes things just happens
13:17:23: cheekygurl:  and you got nothing to blame, but condition
13:17:24: hotheaded bitch:  for a very scientific person
13:17:39: hotheaded bitch:  but for this, you just refuse to see the reason
13:17:51: hotheaded bitch:  it’s because you know the reason
13:17:55: cheekygurl:  it’s just condition
13:17:58: hotheaded bitch:  but you dont want to talk about it
13:18:08: hotheaded bitch:  you dont want to say it
13:18:08: cheekygurl:  just try to survive out of it
13:18:24: hotheaded bitch:  condition happens due to something
13:18:34: cheekygurl:  yes
13:18:42: cheekygurl:  try to survive and break the chain
13:18:45: cheekygurl:  that’s it
13:18:59: hotheaded bitch:  to survive in one piece, you need to get to know your field
13:19:10: hotheaded bitch:  and the underneath it
13:19:12: cheekygurl:  true
13:19:22: hotheaded bitch:  FIND YOUR FUCKING REASON!
13:19:25: cheekygurl:  that’s why i got you and everyone else in my life
13:19:32: hotheaded bitch:  :((
13:19:38: hotheaded bitch:  you are hopeless baby
13:19:47: cheekygurl:  remind me if i stray from my path
13:20:06: hotheaded bitch:  i dont know ur path
13:20:07: cheekygurl:  no way i can survive alone
13:20:16: hotheaded bitch:  your path is you alone to know
13:20:23: cheekygurl:  it’s similar to yours
13:20:24: hotheaded bitch:  and to walk on
13:20:28: hotheaded bitch:  =))
13:20:31: hotheaded bitch:  no it’s not
13:20:36: hotheaded bitch:  it’s a different path
13:20:40: cheekygurl:  that’s why im still here
13:20:44: hotheaded bitch:  i seek wisdom
13:20:47: hotheaded bitch:  you’re not
13:20:57: hotheaded bitch:  i seek understanding of life
13:21:05: hotheaded bitch:  the meaning of my life
13:21:27: hotheaded bitch:  different path
13:21:34: cheekygurl:  oh yeah?
13:21:37: hotheaded bitch:  but our path sometimes crosses
13:21:45: cheekygurl:  well we have similar vehicle
13:22:01: hotheaded bitch:  really?
13:22:05: hotheaded bitch:  i walk, slowly
13:22:13: cheekygurl:  late 2o’s
13:22:18: cheekygurl:  single
13:22:21: cheekygurl:  educated
13:22:25: hotheaded bitch:  :))
13:22:27: cheekygurl:  woman
13:22:31: hotheaded bitch:  we have similar condition
13:22:33: cheekygurl:  nosy
13:22:36: hotheaded bitch:  not vehicle
13:22:44: cheekygurl:  swears a lot
13:22:48: cheekygurl:  vehicle to me
13:22:58: cheekygurl:  it would be different if you’re married
13:23:01: hotheaded bitch:  vehicle is what we use to reach our destination
13:23:13: cheekygurl:  or born as a guy 5 years older than me
13:23:25: cheekygurl:  you will think differently
13:23:30: hotheaded bitch:  i uses knowledge, science, people, experience and sometimes time
13:23:32: cheekygurl:  progress differently
13:23:50: cheekygurl:  true true
13:23:51: hotheaded bitch:  we have similar mind set
13:23:58: hotheaded bitch:  but again
13:23:59: cheekygurl:  and a dab of gut feeling for me
13:24:09: hotheaded bitch:  ;))
13:24:21: hotheaded bitch:  i choose to take things slowly
13:24:33: hotheaded bitch:  take time to understand things
13:24:41: cheekygurl:  yeah… impulses impulses
13:25:00: cheekygurl:  you are such a girl sometimes
13:25:17: hotheaded bitch:  impulsive?
13:25:20: hotheaded bitch:  reactive
13:35:20: hotheaded bitch:  gtg
13:35:33: hotheaded bitch:  ciao bella
13:35:46: cheekygurl:  bye

Two dollars mister, me love you long time

A friend of mine once ask me this, “why is it western guys like asian women who barely speaks English?”.

I said to her, they don’t really need words in bed, just a simple “yes, yes, more, more”, that’ll be sufficient enough to maintain their lovely relationship.

Okay, okay… I’m being mean again.

 

So I had thought it through and only find very few excuses…

1. they think those women are cute with their ‘broken’ English – don’t you think it’s cute when you see a little kid tries to explain what they want to us?? (at least until they got very frustrated and started to scream and had tantrums)
2. it strengthen the ‘exotic’ part of asian women – with native accent and tarzan’s English really hits the erotic centre of their brain.
3. those women cannot ask much – those men can pretend not to understand what the woman wants when she ask for something (“you marry me, me is… you baby in me” – and she ends up being banged again instead of having a wedding band on her finger)
4. those women cannot argue with them – tell me, how can you argue when you have no words for it (since arguing IS exchanging insults to each other… oh, it’s not?? Really?? Okay then, exchanging arguments… better?)
5. and mostly, those women don’t really know the value of high-end brands – okay, they may know channel, LV, etc. but you have to admit it is limited to them… like Manolo, or Bobby Brown (NO, not the rapper who was married to Whitney Houston!!!), or Vivien Westwood, or whatever… I bet, they haven’t even heard of those names before or ever! – translate this to ‘less demands on high-end stuffs’

 

to think but a few…

 

that friend of mine said, “H, if you ever want to hook up with western guy, you need to be unsophisticated with your English like ‘two dollars mister, me love you long time’ kinda thing”

hmm… it’s hard enough for me to communicate what I want with Indonesian men – who I thought speaks the same language as I am… (which actually, now I had this suspicion that we are not speaking the same language at all!!). let alone to speak in that cute, exotic accent – English… whoa!

I want to be heard! I want to be understood! And apparently I have demands!

 

Now… let’s go back to our own people… it seems that, most men like those kind of chicks. Chicks that screams “OMG!”, “Whatevaa…”, or “Un-sos banget deh!” (un-sos is not a word, trust me… and ‘unsociable’ is NOT, let me repeat that NOT the same as ‘autism’! please people, it is a psychological condition that you shouldn’t mock!!! Believe me, you only have half the brain of an autistic child).

But for most men, those chicks are cute and seen child-like (now, you know why paedophiles are such a trend nowadays).

I failed to see the charm of those kind of ‘girls’. (God blessed me for being a woman)… I mean they are irritating, annoying and often repeats whatever their peers had to say – without knowing the real meaning of that freakin’ word!!!

 

Am I being mean (again), if I say that men are afraid to be outsmarted by women? (naah… I’m just being honest!).

So tell me, for me to get a man, should I just become shallow and silly (I refrained myself to say ‘stupid’)? I know I can be silly… most of the time

But shallow? Oh how I wish… shallow people are the happiest people ever! I truly envy them… is it ironic or pathetic?

Do I despise them since they are very superficial, yet envy with how they are contented?

 

Yeah… I’m going with pathetic also!

 

I think I just try to learn broken ‘cute’ English now… (therefore men can correct me anytime)

“me, you, eat!”

“me love shoozz, you buy me shoozz, me love you long time”

 

Sexy eh?